Neurodiversity 101: My Unexpected Crash Course
Forget everything you think you know about autism – this isn’t a tale of limitation, but a raw, unfiltered journey of love, curiosity, and profound understanding.
When 49% of Australians report having a limited understanding of autism, I used to count myself among the informed. As a speech pathologist who’d worked with autistic children for years, I believed I knew the landscape. But nothing – absolutely nothing – could have prepared me for understanding autism through the eyes of my own son.
The Realities Nobody Tells You About
Nobody told me I’d become a professional toy detective, spending hours searching for the perfect item that balances my son’s specific interests with his skills, abilities and sensory needs. Each toy is a calculated risk – will it spark joy or trigger a meltdown? The heartbreak of watching him devastated by a beloved toy that doesn’t meet his precise expectations is indescribable.
Nobody warned me about the complex linguistics of our daily conversations. “What means because?” he’ll ask, “what means yes, what means thank you”. “What does because look like?” These questions reveal a mind so beautifully intricate that I’m simultaneously amazed and challenged, forced to deconstruct language in ways I never imagined.
No one warned me about the hours spent in therapy and assessment appointments. I often arrive late to work because of the many meltdowns in the morning rush.
It can be too much for him. The hours spent picking him up early are due to his distress at daycare. The environment does not suit his sensitivities and busy mind.
I felt guilty sending him back the next day. There was no other option that would take him. We needed to balance the realities of family life.
I could never have appreciated what a confusing world we live in. Why do manufacturers make toys that look different to the picture on the outside of the box? So many subtle differences that I blindly accept are a challenge for him. Servicing suggestions on food packaging – try explaining that this is just a suggestion to someone who takes the world at face value and wonders why their cereal isn’t in the same red bowl with the same berries.
Beyond the Stereotypes
My son doesn’t fit into any neat autism narrative. He’s not a walking encyclopedia or a mathematical savant. He’s a unique universe – sometimes giggling at a ceiling fan’s spin, other times covering his ears at unexpected sounds. His world is rich, complex, and entirely his own.
The Unexpected Emotional Landscape
The anxiety is real. Will people understand his needs? Will they misjudge his behaviours?
I’ve felt the devastating sadness of watching him struggle, feeling simultaneously powerless and fiercely protective. Thinking I should know what to and should be able to manage this.
But then there are moments of pure magic. “Why does the candle dance?” he’ll ask, revealing a perspective so wonderfully different from my own. When he looks right at me and says “I love you Archie” – using his own name but expressing pure, unfiltered affection – my heart explodes with a love I never knew existed.
A Call for True Understanding
Supporting an autistic child isn’t about “fixing” them. It’s about understanding, adapting, and celebrating their unique way of experiencing the world. It’s about being curious, kind, brave, and endlessly patient. Its about shifting expectations (my own and those around us) and picking the battles worth fighting.
To those with limited understanding: Be curious. Ask what autism means for each individual. Learn how to create spaces that are safe and accepting.
To fellow parents: You’re doing amazing. This journey presents challenges, but it also reveals extraordinary beauty.
This World Autism Understanding Day, let’s move beyond mere awareness. Let’s celebrate neurodiversity and recognise that different isn’t less – it’s just wonderfully, beautifully different.
If you or someone you love is looking to take the next step in your journey, feel free to reach out to ORS to see how we can help by calling us on 1800 000 677 or click here to fill out a general enquiry.
